Too late to turn back now...

I'm not entirely sure that taking O.Chem during a 5-week summer session was the wisest thing. It seemed to make sense at the time. The first three weeks have been fairly agreeable, but then suddenly there was some rabbit hole I fell down, and I'm struggling to make sense of it.

The frustrating part, is not that I cannot or won't get the concepts. It is that the language employed at the first of the class is now given as common jargon, like we've been using these descriptions for ages... In that, I'm struggling to follow the logic of a mechanism, but my brain gets hung up on stupid little things, like why that is referred to as *that* and not *this*.

It's frustrating b/c I don't want my instructor to see the confusion on my face, the internal dialog and struggle. It is not that I can't understand it, but to cover the reactions, whether the solvents are beneficial for substitution or elimination; why use a particular nucleophile....and you've only just covered this 60 minutes ago....

It's doubly difficult for me when I really appreciate the instructor I'm learning from. One of the things I absolutely love about learning is when you come across an extremely enthusiastic teacher...someone who loves their subject, find it completely fascinating, and love sharing that. They make the best teachers...their enthusiasm infects you, and it makes the class so much more rewarding.

We have our fourth exam on Wednesday, and a brand-spakin' new ACS certified 1st semester O.Chem exam on Friday. Apparently ACS decided to roll one out...typically the universities reserve the ACS exam for O.Chem II classes.

A small dose of panic is sometimes just what the doctor ordered. A larger dose of panic, and it becomes debilitating. I just want to do well dammit....especially when I really like my professors. Is that so sad?

Maybe none of this makes sense. It could be all the coffee...